If you find it too much effort to look after your own children in public places, here is a helpful guide on how to let others care for your children in playgrounds or similar recreational spaces.
1. Distance yourself from your children (this is likely to be a smart move in any situation when you are out for the day with them).
2. Find a space where you can completely isolate yourself to secure your ‘Me Time’.
3. Under no circumstances should you return to your children whether they are:
- Running riot
- Destroying equipment, flowers or other children
- Talking to strangers
- Walking in front of cyclists or cars nearby
- Poking a dog with a stick
- Climbing the 12-foot-high rope walk
- Screaming their head off because you gave them cola and gummies for breakfast.
- Trying to balance on the centre of the fast spinning roundabout
4. Settle into a phone conversation, work on your tablet or do whatever comes naturally to self-absorb.
5. Calmly and secretly observe how others now take on your parental responsibilities.
6. Ensure you do not make eye contact with anyone who tries to identify the parents.
If you follow these simple steps, in no time at all you will find that other people will take responsibility in a misguided attempt to protect either your children or the surrounding environment.
When this happens, it is mission accomplished!